Thursday, May 1, 2014

Pick a little. Chew a little.

So this blog isn't suddenly going to be all about cancer, but right now that is my experience so there may be a post or two or more.  Right now I am feeling pretty lucky to have very good friends and family to support me on this journey.  And now for the rant: my friends fall into two categories close and casual. I love my close friends and they love me and understand my quirks, insecurities and need to be in charge of my own life. They let me be selfish or lavish with information and they know when to hug and when to back off.  They tell me they will blunder but only out of love and a wish to "be there" for me. They call regularly, bring food and offer distraction. The rant is about a casual friend who upon hearing of my diagnosis came bounding into my life with gushing compassion, and a never ending set of questions..the worst being "what stage is it?"  Look lady. I don't know you. Why do you need to know that about me? Why would you ask? Why do you need to sort out in YOUR head information I did not volunteer? Why do you annoy me so much? Why do you get all pouty when I say:" I know you are trying to be helpful, but your probing interview questions are unwelcome. Please let me share only what I choose. " Why do you a day later send me a text saying "please tell me about your treatment. Does it hurt?"  Delete. Delete. Delete.


Mage said...

Here's a hug. Here's thank yous for leaving me a note. Thanks too for beginning to post in your blog again. So sorry about the cancer. I will think positive things your way everytime I go into work. :)

Tabor said...

You are learning, are you not? I have guilt feeling about how I have treated 'acquaintances' fighting a serious illness. Not probing, but more like pretending they were not really ill. I guess we all learn from this challenge. But there is no room for people who do not listen when you carefully explain what you do not want to hear.

One Woman's Journey - a journal being written from Woodhaven - her cottage in the woods. said...

Thinking of you and so sorry about this life happening.
We have never met
but you are special to me
and I always remember your kind words sent to me.
Please take care and share when it is something you want to do.
Sending healing and peaceful
thoughts your way.
If I were near would bring you something I bake :)

Wisewebwoman said...

Your acquaintance should get the Sensitivity of the Year Award.

If she had brains she's be really dangerous.

What is it with people?

Rough time for you.

I am so sorry.